Not Everyone Loves a Winner

Have you ever felt like you are putting your heart and soul into something to only get criticism and knocked down in return?

Despite what many motivational posters might say, not everyone likes a winner. In fact, many despise people who win, unless it is them!

When I was young I got a job in a warehouse filling orders for a large hardware chain. There was a 90 day probation period to review your performance so I was on. This was my first really good paying job and I didn’t want to mess it up. I worked hard and fast.

Within a couple of weeks I had employees confront me. I was told I needed to slow down and quit working so hard. What I was doing was blowing a hole in their strategy to do little as possible for as much money as possible.

I have found this to be true in my professional life and in the careers of those I coach. When you step up to use your talents and energy to the fullest, those who prefer status quo will do whatever possible to shut you down. They will look for any mistake you make, they will do like those did to me when I was young and try to intimidate you and they will gossip. If all else fails they’ll even fabricate untruths. Anything to knock you off your winning streak is their goal.

So what do you do? Start losing? Slow down?
 Keep Being a Winner but Make Sure You Are in the Right Game

 

  • Consider the Critic
    • First look at who is bringing the grief.
      • Whiners are never Winners. Those who like to complain are looking for something to complain about. You are a gift to them because now they have more to complain about, so keep doing what you are doing
      • Eager Beavers. If you are being confronted by someone who is fighting to climb the ladder and they are intimidated by your performance, just smile and keep doing what you are doing.
      • Lazy Lucy. Those who want to do the least for the most wake up when someone comes in who has a little gusto. A good wake-up call never hurt anyone…keep doing what you are doing.

 

  • Gauge the Gift
    • Self-reflection. Does your gift match your occupation? Is your talent better suited for another field of work? Are you creative working in an industry that does not appreciate creative thinking? If you are someone who colors outside the lines in an industry that freaks when a smudge gets on the paper, it might be time to find a new coloring book.
    • Poll the Passion. Does your passion match your position? Zeal comes from the heart and if your heart does not line up with your company’s mission, you might find yourself winning without any fans to applaud. If you find yourself day-dreaming about being somewhere else, using your gifts for other purposes or feel you are forcing a different vision into your job than what leaders/others like, it is time to reconsider your source of revenue.

Never quit because of the nay-sayers. Focus on those who cheer you on! However do use those moments to reflect on your passion and gifts. Nothing can be more frustrating than not being able to have the freedom to use the gifts and passion that wake you up in the morning. Likewise, nothing is more rewarding!

 

www.coachrobertsimmons.com

ADVICE-What is Your Source?

I recently saw a Facebook post where a man poured his heart out as his wife hit him with the news she wanted a divorce. He was obviously distraught as he communicated his feelings of being lost.

What shocked me was the response from those reading his emotional cries for help.

Men and women alike responses were filled with negative and hatefulness. Some called his wife names though they did not know either of them. He was told to give up and go find a better life. Get a lawyer was many of their recommendation and leave the &%@!. Responders even eluded to his wife being a whore accusing her of messing around with another man, yet again, none knew the man personally nor his situation.

As I read through the comments I was taken back. Here was a person who loved his wife and, at the moment was feeling lost and hopeless, yet they poured fuel on a burning fire. He needed hope yet they piled on heaps of hopeless and reckless advice.

These people were not only giving horrible counsel that was obviously based on their own pitiful experiences, but the guidance they gave could have led him to take his own life! He was in a dark place and not thinking rationally. He was begging for a spark of hope yet few could muster up one ounce of encouragement. It was disgusting to say the least.

“For by wise counsel you will wage your own war,
and in a multitude of counselors there is safety.” Proverbs 24:6

 

When looking for counsel we should not seek just “any” opinion, but rather we should search for “wise” counsel. What is Wise Counsel? Whether you are in need of advice or find yourself talking to someone in need, Wise Advice always gives hope and is based on Biblical truths. Wisdom is not given based on emotional experiences, but on factual and beneficial insight.

 

“Those who are wise shall shine like the brightness of the firmament, and those who turn many to righteousness like the stars forever and ever.” Daniel 12:3

 

Have you ever heard the phrase, “Birds of a feather flock together?” That is true! People who fail do not want anyone else to succeed. They will do anything to make sure someone else does not get through something they were unable to make it to the other side of. Good counselors give life-giving advice. Wise counsel gives hope despite the situation. Those who have failed and want others to fail are not people to listen to.

When seeking advice be careful who you listen to. Are they a people who want you to come through the storm blessed? Do they have your best interest in mind? Do you feel encouraged after speaking with them?

We all need hope so be careful where you get directions in life from. It is possible to get more lost if we have the wrong people mapping out our paths.

 

Robert is the owner of Leading Life Coaching & Leadership Services. He is a certified professional Life Skills coach with more than 25 years of experience in helping men and women navigate life’s decisions.

For more information contact Robert: info@coachrobertsimmons.com

www.coachrobertsimmons.com