WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY DUCKS AREN’T IN A ROW!

The makeup is perfect and there’s not a wrinkle in her dress. It’s Monday morning and as Aileen walked across the floor to her office people seemed to look in envy. “How does she always look so perfect?” some ask. There is never anything out of place and her life seems to go off without a blemish.

At the end of the day Aileen gets in her car, makes the trek toward home and she walks into the door of her apartment. There is where we meet the real Aileen. Almost immediately she is greeted with clothes that are piled up in the floor. In the kitchen are dishes from last night’s supper and the trashcan could use a good scrubbing. Aileen walks past the kitchen toward her spare bedroom only to be reminded of the pile of bills she has yet to pay; there are stacks of envelopes, some not even open, strewn throughout the room.

Aileen continues back to her bedroom where the makeup from the morning rush of running late is on the floor and she sits on the edge of the unmade bed. There she puts her head in her hands and tears begin to flow from her eyes as she is faced with the real life she lives.

Aileen is like so many people who struggle with ADD/HD. She fights hard to keep on outward appearance of having everything together, yet inside she is struggling. Her mind races a thousand miles per hour, constantly switching from one thought to the next. There are task that need to be done but she doesn’t know where to start. Even if she did get started, what does it matter? She never finishes anything anyway she thinks. How much Aileen wishes her life behind the scenes was like the image she portrays with her colleagues at work.

People who are like Aileen often feel alone and hopeless; life is overwhelming. The fight not to allow anyone in past the outward image becomes a daily battle causing more frustration and tension.

The antidote for Aileen’s problems?

Do the opposite of what she is doing! She needs to let someone in past the façade!

Those with ADD/HD often find themselves embarrassed to let anyone know where they need help. Letting others know that you lose your keys to the car daily or that your bills are piling up, not because you don’t have the money to pay them, but simply because you don’t want to do them, isn’t exactly things a person wants everyone to know.

Finding someone who you can trust to talk about these things and who can help you along is exactly what is needed. Whether you are single or married, it is important to let someone in to help with the areas that need shoring up. Here are a few ideas that might help you get going in the right direction:

  • MAKE IT FUN
    • Ever look at doing laundry as a Social Event? Probably not; however it can be! Invite your close friend over for coffee and snacks. Let him/her know that you have some boring task to do and need someone to talk to in order to get it done. You will be surprised at how quickly time goes by and how much you can get accomplished.
    • This can work for more than just the laundry. Try it with organizing that much avoided closet or garage. All task go smoother when we can find a way to make it fun!

 

  • RIGHT PERSON, RIGHT JOB
    • I have often found my clients are in the wrong role at home. If you are married make sure your task match your talents. For example, if you are a procrastinator and are easily overwhelmed with things like paying bills, it is probably a good idea if you don’t do the bills.
    • Jobs in the home are not about GENDER. They are about SHARING and ABILITY. Erase society’s perspective on what’s the man’s role and what’s the woman’s. Who is good at what? Sometimes you might have to choose the lesser of two evils, but that’s okay.

 

  • HIRE OUT
    • If your budget allows, hire out. Accountants, cleaning services, organizational experts and almost any aspect of life where a little help is needed, there is someone out there with a business that can help. More times than not, the added cost can save you money in the long run and will add years to your life from the avoided stress you’ll experience.

 

  • COUNSELING/COACHING
    • It has been proven that counseling and/or coaching can help a person move forward in life. Having someone who understands your struggles and help give an unbiased perspective toward getting out of the muck is invaluable. Counseling/coaching is a great option for the person who does not feel as though he or she has anyone to talk to or who can help. The return on your investment could be a permanent life change!

What are some ways you have found to overcome your ADD/HD?

Is there a trick that you have found?

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